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LET'S ALL REMEMBER THE ONLY PERFECT PERSON DIED ON A CROSS THOUSANDS OF YEARS AGO.
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Bilard 8 - 2009

Bilard 8 - 2009

Bilard 8 - 2009
1 rok 128 dni temu

Neary there

     Here it is 2 am and I have to be at the hospital at 5:30.  It is too hot to sleep here tonight,and I got an hr drive to the hospital. Wish I could sleep.

Four more days

     Four more days till I get my ablation.  Part of me is excited.  I am hoping to get a normal life back. Part of me is really scared, because even though my doctor says I am a prime candidate for this a part of my brain wonders to the things that could go wrong.   I made a short list of things my family should know just in case something bad happens.  BUT I am really hopping it all goes easy and perfect, and they put an end to this problem for ever.  It makes me nervous the doctor wants to put a loop recorder into my chest. I do not like foreign objects in my body. I have been thinking about some of the implantable things that have went bad in the past for other people.  He said he wants to do it to monitor my heart rate to get me off the blood thinner and some of the other meds. SOUNDS GOOD RIGHT? , but I saw a video where it says you can in fact get a blood clot from the procedure itself.  If I understand how this loop thing works correctly that would do nothing to spot a clot from the procedure.   Part of me thinks keeping the blood thinner for a bit longer may be a better way to go.  I plan to call the doctor tomorrow and ask them about clots from the procedure. My brother thinks the loop is a good idea, but the whole idea frightens me. It has a battery. What if it breaks, or what if i get hit in the chest somehow would it break it, and if so what would happen?  These are some of the questions I want answered BEFORE I allow it put into my chest.  I was always a worrier , but now I have something real to worry about. I need as many of my questions answered as possible, before I have this done.  I also need to ask them about that one med and if it is whyIi have had an upset stomach every time I eat sense they raised the dosage on it.  
     I am counting down the days, and trying to convince myself it will all go smoothly and I will come out of it feeling like a new person. :)   I will keep you all posted on how it went soon as I feel like getting back on line after it is done. 
   I have had 2 cardiac caps in the past and they both went easy, but they took them in through my arm.  This is going in through the grin, and I am not the skinniest person in the world.   I already asked the doctor about my weight being a factor and could it cause it to get infected he said no it will not, so we will see.  :)  If I am rambling it is because the closer it comes to the day the more anxious I get about it.  I really want it done. I am hoping for the best, but every once in a while one of those what if thoughts sneaks into my head.  Right now I am trying really hard to keep everything from spiking up. I do not want to be in my hometown hospital ( that does not do this procedure) on the day I am supposed to be in another hospital in another town.   I keep telling myself keep calm it will all be over in less then a week.   I appreciate all the good advice you all have been giving me.  If anyone has any first hand experience about those loop recorders I would love to hear it even if it is not good.  I need to know what I am signing up for.  I find knowledge of an event helps to quiet the what if thinking.

I hate these restrictions

     They called me today to set up the ct scan for my procedure, and what they told me is not good for my rising anxiety.  I have never been to this hospital before and my sense of direction sucks on a good day when my anxiety is high it is worse. They do not plan to let my brother into the hospital. I want him there because when my anxiety gets high I can not focus on things well.  You can laugh if  you want, but I got this image in my head of me being lost in that hospital looking for a way back to my brother like a mouse looking for the cheese in a maze.  I can am sure being scared will not help my heart rate a bit.
     I just keep telling myself stick with it and hold it together for 2 more weeks and a better life may be just around the bend. 

The date is set

   They called me today and the procedure on my heart is scheduled for June 11, and I have to go get a cat scan or June 5 to get ready for the procedure. I am kinda looking forward to getting it over with, but as the day grows closer I am more nervous about it. I am really going to hate the trip to that hospital. I have to go across a long bridge, and I am frightened of bridges, well not so much the bridge as the possibility it could break with me on it.
    If this works it will be worth all the anxiety and stress involved in getting it fixed.  I am going to try to focus on how much better my life will be when I do not have to be scared of going into afib anymore ( she said hopefully lol).  I am trying to keep my eye on the prize at the end of this all. I will keep you all posted as how it goes.

It is decided

   Well I saw the electrologist and after talking to him. I have decided to have the ablation.  He answered all my questions, and I looked him up on line he has all good reviews and no bad ones.n0.gif?v=122 One thing that does make me a bit nervous though is he wants me to let them put this thing in my chest to monitor if I go into afib after the procedure,  He said that way he could take me off the blood thinners. I really do not like the idea of anything with a battery being put inside my body, but my brother went with me to the appointment, and he thinks it is a good ideal to have the monitor put in. Apparently the battery in that will last for 4 years, but they really only need to keep an eye on it for a few months to see if the procedure worked. 
   I really hope it will work.  Now it is a waiting game to see when they can get me on the schedule, and I will have to get a ct scan before the procedure.  I was in normal rhythm when i went to the doctor.  I told him I knew that I can tell by the feel of it when I go into afib, and I knew I was not in it at that time.   I am just hoping I can keep it that way till they can get me scheduled.
I just know I can not go on like this. They need to do something. I am scared , but if it works it will be worth all the anxiety and pain it takes to get there. Thank you all for your input and prayers I appreciate it.