jcesplace

Rejestracja: 2007-05-21
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You Gotta Be Kidding

Was reading my news app and seems someone did a survey and claim that having sex was the equivalent to running 8 miles. Now...now...now you tell me who can run 8 miles in 30 seconds. Really, I just wanna know.


The Storm

The Devil whispered in my ear, "You're not strong enough to withstand the storm". Today I whispered in the Devil's ear, "I am a child of God, a man of faith and a Warrior of Christ .......I am the storm". Author unknown


Lottery

A man asked his wife, "What would do if I told you I won the lottery"? She answered, "I'd take half and leave you". He said "I won $12 here's your $6 and keep in touch".


Literal

It turns out a major study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys. Makes sense to me, I mean I've never eaten a monkey.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said "This isn't working". I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working just fine.


Southern Women

If a Southern Woman says "What did you say?" She isn't asking you to repeat it.
She's asking if you're good with Jesus....cause you're about to meet Him.